Deciding to have sex with someone is a big decision. If you think that you are ready to have sex, it is important that you are aware of the different laws about how old you have to be to have sex, and to understand what the law means by sex. Before you have sex, you should talk to a health professional about how to practice safe sex and to make sure you are fully aware of the risks of practising unsafe sex.
Remember, it is NEVER ok for someone to force you to have sex without your permission – you have the right to say NO at any time.
|What you need to know – summary
It is never okay for a person to have sex with another person who is under 12 years old.
If you are aged 12-15 years old, you can legally have sex with another person who is less than 2 years older than you (as long as you both actively agree to it).
Once you turn 16, you can legally have sex with another person who is also aged 16 years or older (as long as you both actively agree to it).
Also, a person in a position of care or authority e.g. a teacher, parent, step-parent, guardian, counsellor, doctor or sports coach cannot have sex with a person aged 16-17 years old under their care.
The age of consent is the age at which the law says you can agree (consent) to have sex.
If you are under the age of consent, the law says that you cannot legally agree to have sex, and any person that tries to have sex with you has broken the law.
“Consent” means giving your free agreement to sex. It is never ok, and it is a crime, for someone to assume you have given consent, or to force you to keep going if you want to stop. A person can also withdraw their consent at any time during sex.
A person does not give their consent include if they:
On this page, sex means when a penis, finger, object or any part of a person is fully or partially inside another person’s vagina, anus, or any kind of oral sex.
Sex here does not involve kissing, or touching if there is no penetration. However, please be aware that other sexual activity that doesn’t technically involve penetration may be considered sexual assault. For more information about these laws please see our Victoria page on sexual assault.
Also, there are also special laws applying to sex that is filmed, photographed or distributed online or by phone, for more information about these laws please see our Victoria page on sexting.
If you are under 12 years old
It is NEVER ok for a person to have sex with a person under 12 years old.
If you are 12-15 years old
If you are aged 12-15 years old, you can legally have sex with someone that is less than 2 years older than you OR if the person you had sex with believed you were aged 16 or older.
If you are under 16 years old
Generally you cannot have sex with another person who is under 16 years old unless you meet one of the exceptions listed above.
If you are aged 16 to 17 years old
When you are 16 years or older, you can have sex with another person aged 16 or older if you both freely consent to it.
However, you cannot have sex with someone who is caring for you, supervising you or has authority over you, like a teacher, sports coach, youth worker, counsellor, foster carer, religious instructor, health professional, police officer or employer while you are aged 16-17.
Important Information for all ages
No matter how old you are, it is never ok to have sex with someone without their consent.
If you, or anyone you know, has been sexually abused, the experience and impact of that will be different for everyone, but whatever your reaction, it is a normal response to an extreme situation. You are not to blame. Please also see our Victoria pages on Sexual Assault and Child Abuse for more information.
If you are confused about the law (it is confusing so don’t worry), please contact us here.
If someone is found guilty of breaking the laws around age of consent, they can be charged with a serious criminal offence, sent to jail and placed on a public sex offender registry.
The public sex offender registry is a list of adults who have been found guilty of a sex crime. Registered sex offenders are required to keep the police informed about their personal details, whereabouts and travel arrangements. They are also required to report the names and ages of children with whom they live or have regular contact.
Registered sex offenders are not allowed to work in any child-related employment.
Deciding to have sex with someone is a big step. Remember that the decision is up to you. If you feel pressured to have sex, or if you’re not sure you want to, you can say no. The other person must respect your choice. If they try to have sex with you without your agreement, they are committing a crime.
If you are thinking about having sex, please be aware of the risks that are involved with unsafe or unprotected sex. These risks include:
For information about how you can protect yourself against the risks of unsafe sex, you contact Family Planning Victoria on (03) 9257 0100 or visit their website.
You can contact any of the services below to talk about anything relating to sex including safe sex, if you’re not sure what is considered normal in a relationship, or if you are worried you might be pregnant.
They are not the police or a government department, and you do not have to give them your name if you don’t want to.
You can check out these helpful resources for more information on sex:
If you have a legal question, and you are aged 24 or under, you can contact us here.
If you have a problem or a question, you can send it to us today and we can provide you with free advice, information and referrals to help solve your problem. Just click on the button below.Get help now